


Yuri High: a dumb inside joke based off of a crossover webcomic

by Marbll_McDibble



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon), ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
Genre: F/F, Lesbians, Maybe - Freeform, Scissoring, a lot of lesbians, hand holding, i dont know if i did the bible tags correctly, if I even get that far, weird sex stuff related to the plot and lore somehow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-07-16
Packaged: 2019-05-02 11:16:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14543538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marbll_McDibble/pseuds/Marbll_McDibble
Summary: basically this is a little crossover fic based off of the very minimal lore some friends of mine and i got from the tiniest amount of lore from a webcomic on smackjeeves called yaoi high, but this time it has lesbians and even more weird lore. It starts off with lapis, a newcomer to yuri high who knows absolutlely nothing and has a shorter, triangle haired gem help her.join them on this zany quest.





	1. One - Lapis makes an entrance

While eating breakfast, Lapis got a knock on her door.  
She lived alone, of course, and didn’t really associate with anyone.  
She opened the door and found herself looking at the ground.  
There was a small creature there, holding a letter up to her.  
Without a word, she snatched it out of the creature’s hand and closed the door, reading the letter and walking to the nearest place to sit.

“You have been chosen for the YURI highschool breeding program…” Lapis read aloud, reading the rest in silence. She let out a sigh, got up, and went to pack her things. She assumed she had to be there as soon as possible considering the letter didn’t give a particular date, and she didn’t even have much to pack so she was up and out pretty quickly.

When she arrived, she was one of the only ones there, greeted by colorful signs saying things like “welcome first years!” or just “welcome.” only then to be greeted by an over enthusiastic face, startling her a bit  
“Hello!!” the girl in front of the gem said, “Could i get your identification please?”  
Lapis handed her a paper.  
“Lapis Lazuli… OH! Welcome!! Find a place to sit in the sitting area, please!”  
Lapis found her way over to a chair, and plopped down in it, right next to another gem.  
The other gem looked… newer than Lapis. She had metallic limbs, a visor, and triangle-ish hair. Must have been an era 2 gem, not that she cared, though.  
The era 2 gem looked over at Lapis, and softly said “Hi,” as though to start a conversation. This caused lapis to look back over to the era 2 gem, softly saying a greeting back.  
“My name is peridot,” The era 2 stated, “I’m of a newer cut than you, it seems? Are you an era 1 gem?”  
“I’m Lapis, and yes, I’m era 1,” Lapis sighed. “It’s nice to meet you, peridot.” The blue gem held out her hand for the other to shake. Peridot responded by handing Lapis one of her robotic fingers shyly, and letting lapis shake that.  
“Who’s that girl that greeted me?” Lapis asked.  
“I don’t know for sure, but I’ve heard her name is Pinkie or something of the sort.”  
“I see…”


	2. two - time well spent - lapidot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a peridot centered chapter set about 48 hours after the first one, lots of hinted lapidot, and introductions to 2 more characters.  
> also, jojo gals incoming.

It had been two days since their first meeting, after they chatted during the mandatory physical exams much to peridot’s insistence. And now she was pacing back and forth on her actual feet, her limb enhancers having been taken off that morning, mumbling to herself with her roomate, Pearl, who was spectating.

Peridot wanted friends, other than the one gem she had to confide in when she felt this way which was in fact Pearl at this very moment.  
“Don’t you think you’re over exaggerating this, dear?” Pearl asked calmly.  
“No, I don’t,” Peridot yelled, “She was really nice even when I think was being an annoyance to her. I kinda wanna talk to her more, but I never see her! I don’t even know which dorm she’s in!”

Pearl smiled. “Why don’t you leave the dorm for a while and walk around? You might run into her that way.”

Peridot thought about it for a moment  
“YOU’RE RIGHT!!!” she shrieked before running out of the room.  
“You forgot your limb enhancers!”  
“I don’t need them!”

Racing through the hallways into the cafeteria and around and around inside the building, she eventually ran into what felt like a brick wall and falling back. Rubbing her nose, she got up.  
“Sorry,” She started, looking up to see a familiar blue face.  
“It’s okay… Peridot, right?” Lapis said softly. “Are you okay?” She asked.  
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Peridot responded, smiling giddily. “I’ve been looking all over for you!”  
Lapis, taken slightly aback, smiled nervously at this statement. “Really?”  
“Yeah!” Peridot tried toning down her enthusiasm, “I just… really wanted to talk to you…”  
Lapis’ nervous smile turned into a genuine one.  
“I’d like that.”

======================================

Sitting down at a lonely lunch table, Lapis chuckled.  
“Why are we even here?” She asked the smaller one. “We’re gems, we don’t need to eat.”  
“Pearl is here and she doesn’t eat,” Peridot explained, “I think it’s mostly about fitting in because most of the people here are humans and not gems.”  
“I guess you have a point. It still doesn’t make much sense to me though…”

Someone else sat at the table. She was human, she had dark skin, white hair and hazel eyes. Her lips were stained with a dull shade of red, and she wore a red shawl over her midriff top, along with a black skirt worn over dark pantyhoes and red colored shoes. Her hands were adorned with white gloves, and her hair accompanied by a pair of sunglasses.

“Sorry, girls,” She apologised, “But Midler and I usually sit here. We’ll let you sit here today, of course, but tomorrow you might have to move if you’re nuisances to us.”  
There was something magnetic about that girl, but Lapis and Peridot couldn’t think of what.  
“Mariah,” Another girl, who they assumed was Midler, walked up to the table, “I could hear you from 5 feet away! Don’t be so threatening to them, they obviously didn’t know.”  
Mariah sighed, and nodded in reply as Midler sat down, smiling.  
Midler was wearing more revealing clothing of a belly dancer motif, accompanied by glorious blues and yellows, complimented greatly by her darkish purple hair.  
“Hi! I’m Midler, and this is Mariah,” Midler spoke up, her eyes gleaming in the lighting of the room. “Who are you guys?”  
“I’m… Lapis,” Lapis shyly introduced herself, quickly averting her eyes from the human women before her, “And this is-”  
“I’M PERIDOT!” Peridot managed to squeak out, sweating profusely. “I-I mean, I’m Peridot.”  
Mariah chuckled. “You two are interesting people. Like you, Lapis, why’re you blue?”  
“I’m blue because I’m a gem, I’m literally Lapis Lazuli but in a humanoid form.”  
“I don’t understand a single fucking word you said, but I’ll take it. Does that go for your friend there, too?”  
“Yeah.”

=================================

Lunch was over, and Lapis was walking Peridot back to her dorm. Stopping for a second, Lapis and Peri both tried to take drinks from nearby different heighted water fountains--not because they needed to, but because they wanted to--both receiving a soft shock, not enough to destabilize them, just to disorient them.  
“Ow,” Lapis exclaimed, “Whoever owns this place really needs to fix their shit. You shouldn’t get shocked by water fountains as far as I know.”  
“Faulty wiring is just something you have to deal with when you’re human, I guess.”

Those shocks didn’t come from wiring, however. They came from outlets. Electrical outlets placed there on purpose by Mariah and Midler right before the gems stopped to drink some water. They’d put them out for anyone, they did that often, not specifically the gems.  
They giggled as they watched and followed the gems, seeing them inch closer and closer to one another.  
This was going to be a fun spectacle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and here we are, another chapter. I really had fun writing this one, even though its still kinda short. I'm trying to write the characters I know as accurately as possible and I can't wait till I get around to writing the next chapter


	3. three - stuck in the middle with you - lapidot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peridot and lapis encounter a rather sticky situation.

Slowly but surely, the gems inched closer to each other, peridot being the first to notice.  
“Hey, stop walking so close to me, lapis, im gonna get tripped up...”  
“Am I?” Lapis asked, “I never noticed.”  
It’s not like Lapis could move though, suddenly enough an ocean of students exited the library, pushing the two into each other in quite a compromising way. Peridot’s face was shoved into Lapis’ bosom, hands glued to the taller blue gem’s stomach  
“What the hell, peridot?!” Lapis yelled, a little too loudly. The entire hallway had cleared out a bit and people were surrounding them, staring at them.  
“I c-can’t move…” Peridot said, voice cracking slightly  
“Really?” Lapis asked, “Then let me help you.” She said, putting her hands on peridot’s hair to push her off. This was met with no success, causing both parties to let out a strained sigh.  
“Alright… lets just… get out of here,” Lapis said, trying to inch the two through the crowd, “Peridot, help me and move your fucking legs.”  
“Oh! S-sorry!” Peridot mumbled, trying her best to move in unison with lapis. They inched out of the crowd slowly, and once they were out, while still being closely spectated, lapis held on to the metal bars separating the 2nd level from the main square of the building.

And suddenly, lapis couldn’t move her hands or her body away from the bars.  
“What’s going on?!” Peridot seemed to yell.  
“I-I don’t know!” Lapis responded. The whole spectacle, the whole show, to her, was mildly embarrassing.

They heard laughter from a nearby corridor. Lapis looked behind her.  
The two girls they’d met at lunch were, there, staring at the whole thing.  
They must have had something to do with this, Lapis thought.  
A pipeline broke, and there was water shooting into the hallway, and then lapis took control of it, shooting herself across the way, metal bars and all.

“Are you responsible for this?!” Lapis asked the girls, her and her boob companion now completely drenched.  
“I’m sorry,” Mariah laughed, “I don’t know what you’re going on about.”  
Lapis’s eyes filled with rage.  
“Don’t play stupid,” Lapis growled.  
Mariah laughed even more, and then let out a breathy sigh. “All right, all right. I’ll come clean. I’m totally behind this. Such a shame you had to experience bastet’s power firsthand like that.”  
“Bastet?” Peridot asked, “Isn’t that some human deity?”  
“Yes, but she’s also my stand,” Mariah smirked, “Sadly I can’t undo the effects unless im put under dire circumstances...”  
Midler, on the other hand, was trying not to laugh her ass off, as the entire thing was so… embarrassingly hilarious.

Quickly, Lapis gathered up all the water that hadn’t dried up and placed it right around Mariah’s head.  
“Undo this and you won’t fucking drown,” Lapis threatened the woman before her.  
“Mariah!” Midler shrieked.  
The effects of the stand were lifted, as lapis effortlessly let go of the metal bars.  
Mariah was let go. She started coughing up water, Midler picking her up and running off.  
“We’re sorry!!” Midler yelled before she turned the corner, presumably headed to the nurses office.  
Peridot moved her face out of Lapis’ bosom, revealed to be blushing profusely.  
“Sorry about that…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah yes, I love me some Bastet tomfoolery with the gals.
> 
> If you have any feedback, feel free to leave it in the comments!


	4. four - especially for gems - lapidot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lapis and peridot find a strange room, and make a dire discovery.

After the incident, Midler and Mariah started being nicer to Lapis and Peridot. Especially Lapis. They sat at their table, earned favours from them, the like, but that was mostly a lunch and/or class time thing.

Between classes or before curfew, Lapis and peridot tended to walk around, often finding places they didn’t know existed. This was one of those times, lapis saw a room that looked like a built in greenhouse but it was all indoors.  
“Woah. What’s up with that place?” Lapis asked the shorter gem.  
“It says it’s a biology lab here on this plaque…”  
“Wanna go in?”  
“Yeah!”

The gems went into the room, and were only met with the image of the same plant. Carrots, but with strange additions at the leafy bit, almost making it look more phallic.   
Then something stirred.  
The gem’s eyes darted around the room as something- rather someone- popped up.

“Hi,” The person greeted, a goofy smile on their face. “I’m the biology teacher, but this isn’t much of a classroom. I call it my cock carrot greenhouse.”  
“Cock carrots….?” Peridot smirked.  
“Bioengineered carrots to make your.. Uh, juices... act more like sperm. They don’t actually give you dicks though. Don’t eat them. They’re for the… you know. Even then only one partner is allowed to eat them, especially with gems like you two.”  
“What do you mean ‘especially with gems’?” Lapis interrogated.  
“Well… we’ve had cases of birth being fatal to gems. Your child will come out as your fusion gem, but at the loss of your partner. It’s happened to quite a few, including a diamond we thought was a quartz… gems grow fast though, so your child would be grown within a few days. Since we aren’t putting injectors into the planet they don’t come out fully grown.”

Peridot and Lapis stood there, eyes wide and silent.  
Peridot scoffed, “Then i guess we’d have to be the ones eating the carrots with whoever-”  
“Peri. Come on, let’s go.”

They walked in silence until curfew hit, only then parting ways.

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter was kind of short but i liked how it turned out. If i end up continuing this then that probably means im really tired and have nothing really better to do.


End file.
